The Life of the Highly Emotional

Get ready for some major transparency.

So, I'm pretty sure the third trimester is just like the first. One symptom I'm dealing with now is being so darn emotional. I feel like I am in "The Waiting Place." Oh Dr. Seuss how you were right! Life has so many seasons and ups and downs. I am having a lot of trouble choosing joy lately. I am avoiding God. Do you ever do that. I know that some of the feelings I am having of jealousy and worry and fear are sinful. I am trying to overcome them, but I think being pregnant compounds some of these feeling making it more difficult. Hence I am ashamed to even ask God for help because I try to do it on my own. Dumb I know. I know I need to pray more and throw myself into his word, but for some reason it is hard for me right now. The one place I know I will find comfort I resist. Why? Maybe it's that fear thing again. Maybe I will hear something I don't like. I don't know what it is, but if you do read this I could sure use some prayer. Hmm... I seem to being using a lot of I statements. That is probably problem #1. Too much focus on me and not enough focus on Him.

Work was hard today. I mean really hard. My husband needs a better paying job. We need God to do his thing with this ministry we are trying to get going. I need to be more loving and not so stand offish. Those are some of the things on my mind and weighing me down.

Now the upside so I don't leave feeling like a Debbie downer!

• Harper's Dr. Appt. went well. I did the glucose test and will find out the results soon hopefully.
• I got to see her beautiful profile and feel and see her move on the screen.
• This little girl's kicks and movement always cheer me up.
• My sister sent me a hilarious picture today of what Logan drew. Basically he drew the same thing three times, but said it was a turtle, a shark, and a catfish. Catfish? really lol I needed the laugh.
• One of my students brought me Valentine's onesie for Harper. So sweet.
• I can tell my students love me.
• Jacob gave me the best Vday present ever. A book he made about the three of us. He wrote and illustrated it!
• I made the pioneer womans roasted garlic mashed potatoes and they were a success!
• Jacob has an interview to do a part time ministry. (enter prayer here)
• I had my final evaluation done at school and I got high marks.
• Tomorrow is Friday!!!
• I found out how much my delivery is going to cost and it was a reasonable amount that I know we can handle. (enter sigh of relief)

Ok, that was therapeutic. Maybe I'll join one of those Wednesday links about joy and thankfulness. It sure helps when you really take time to think and reflect on all the blessings in your life.

Sorry to bore you with this very deep message. If you are still reading thanks! I promise the next one will be better!

-Jennifer

And just so this won't be a pictureless post here is one of my love showing his pregnancy figure. I love him! :)